Session Report: Lootin’ Tootin’

Balances out playing a 5e rogue with a net modifier bonus of +0

A first session report as a punter. One of my Barrowmaze players volunteered to run a dungeon in the campaign world to try out Off-White Cube, so I got to roll up a character myself. And rather splendidly did the dice fall:

Enter Woakeston, a former butler to the nobility taking a ‘sabbatical’. My very own DMPC.

This was my first opportunity to try out the Adventurer class. In Off-White Cube it is the customisable class – each level the character gets to improve two of the following aspects by 1:

  • Combat Bonus
  • Specialism Bonus
  • Saving Throw
  • Hit Dice
  • Spell slot (spells slots in a tier – my preferred term for spell level – must be fewer than the tier below)

Accompanying doodles were done at the table – I prefer my session notes to be visual prompts.


Wee Davey (level 1 Druid)
Kalis (level 1 Duellist)
Woakeston (level 1 Adventurer)
Miggs (level 1 Monk)

Opening scene: an enthusiastic young adventurer proudly showing off a glass box full of sapphires. As soon as he opened it he was killed by a fast-growing tree sprouting out of him. Documents on him suggested he’d been to a nearby temple. The four treasure hunters assembled a group, hired Toast Rack’s son and daughter (Toast Rack being a hireling lost on a previous expedition) to join them, and another adventurer to make up the numbers. A day’s travel brought us to the temple.

A family business

Three statues stood outside of a woman holding various animals (two fauns and a fox), with various candles scattered around. They lit the candles and petted the fauns, on the instructions of some old elven runes. A secret door behind one statue swung open.

Leaving Toasty, Toast Rack’s daughter, outside to guard our rented horses, the party descended into the depths. One of the first rooms brought them to an equine statue stood upon a patch of earth. Wee Davey leapt upon the back of the statue and awaited his death. Nothing happened. The party, noticing that the horse could be moved, shoved it aside and had Toast Rack Jnr dig away at the earth. He uncovered a glass box with two sapphires. Warily the group stowed it away.

Rising through the ranks

Bracing the statue against the walls, the party descended down some icy stairs with the help of some rope. A door to the side led to to an old guardian tree with an axe stuck in it. Wee Davey, druid extraordinaire, tugged the axe out, and the group spent the next while placating the annoyed guardian creature. Apparently the axe, of very fine worksmanship when used against wood, had been left there by the now-deceased young temple discoverer.

The guardian’s tree mistress was mourning the loss of her daughter, and had abandoned this temple, allowing some white-fire spirits and salamanders to disturb it. Our heroes declared that they would see about resolving this matter.

Whereupon a pack of icy salamanders attacked from the rear. Casting oil and a flaming torch, the beasts were slain with a lone survivor scurrying away. Giving chase revealed another entrance to the temple by a lake, but little else of interest. There were more salamanders in the water. Returning to main area the temple and advancing further, the party came across another patch of earth. Toast Rack Jnr started digging again, but some creeping roots or branches emerged from the soil, grabbed him and dragged the poor fellow down beneath the ground. Our grand heroes tried to save him but were themselves grappled, and found themselves forced to retreat.

Like father, like son

The tree guardian gave a figurative shrug and noted that the guardians hadn’t been fed for a very long time.

Seeking an alternative route, the crew came to an unnaturally darkened room. Woakeston crawled in on his hands and knees. Feeling something small and furry brush against him, he attempted to pet it in the manner of the statues at the entrance, and felt a weight drop against his left thigh. Retreating out of the room, he found an exquisite sword at his side which caused tall grass to grow in its wake.

Pushing on, with Kalis spin-kicking open (and occasional crumpling up in front of) the various doors, the party came into a room with a statue of the same woman cradling a dead faun. Alas, with time ticking, the adventurers felt compelled to retreat and head back to Helix, determined to return and source some more treasure.

A hearty thanks to our splendid GM – it’s nice to get out from behind the screen!

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